LIFE AND DEATH ON TWITTER

This is a two-part blog, with a PRIZE at the end!

THE LIFE

Today, friends, I want to pause and reflect on something. This is the 24th day of Blog Every Day in April—an event that kicked off when I causally mentioned on Twitter that I thought it might be good to blog every day in April. I was just sort of talking . . . and by the end of that day, not only was I committed to blogging every day in April, but a few hundred OTHER people were committed to blogging every day in April.

It simply sprouted—this whole community. And now, three weeks in, I have gotten to know several of you. (I may be following you and YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW IT!)
And hopefully, through BEDA buddies and other means, you have gotten to know each other.

Now, as we go into the LAST SEVEN DAYS of BEDA, I want to hit the reset button. You often have to do this in life—in projects long and short, and in relationships. You take a moment when you’re well into the madness to stop and say, “Let’s go back to the beginning and remember what this is all about.”

So during this last week . . . why not make renew your effort? I’m going to redouble my efforts to read as many blogs as I can. And if you have had trouble blogging every day for the month, why not blog every day for the last week? Why not read and comment on a few extra blogs? It’s only a week . . . and you never know what might come out of it. I didn’t know I would be making so many new friends, or that I would be taking a . . .

Well, let’s get to that, shall we?

THE DEATH

Maybe a week ago, I casually made the bet that if the Suite Scarlett paperback made the New York Times bestseller list, I would take a trapeze lesson at the New York Trapeze School. I said this TO ILLUSTRATE A POINT! That by building in a negative consequence to a positive thing, you feel great if it doesn’t happen! I was TRYING TO PERFORM A PUBLIC SERVICE.

Which was bad enough. And then I went to Las Vegas for the week to speak, and clearly the spirit of the place infected me. I don’t gamble on GAMES OF CHANCE, but I am never opposed to a SPORTING CHALLENGE. Which is why I put out my one day BONUS ROUND, in which I promised to go to trapeze school if you managed to get Scarlett into the top 1,000 on Amazon. Vegas makes you crazy. It makes you spontatnous. It makes you “use” “quotation” marks in “weird” ways.*



The concept of authors staring at the Amazon rank is one that has already been deftly examined by Scott Westerfeld in Extras.** I’ve even discussed it myself here and here.*** But again, I was under the sway of Vegas, the glittering lights and the shiny numbers and everything going BING BING BING all the time. I was also operating under the assumption that not many people knew the book had snuck out a week early, and that this was a fair and pretty safe thing to put out there.

“Oh, who will even notice!” I chuckled to myself. “The book is not supposed to be out until May 1st! It is a sporting lark!”

Honestly, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

Oh, sure, I was laughing when it was touching 1,400. “It will get close and back off,” I thought, as I rode home in the taxi from the airport. “Won’t that be funny!”

And then, it updated. And was #673. And then 500 something and 400 something and someone told me it was 300 something while I was sleeping. It hardly matters WHAT it got to, the point is it went under 1,000 which means I LOST.

I mean, certainly I won in the sense that many of you went out and bought Scarlett, and I do love her very much. But I lost in the sense that I CHALLENGED you and YOU WON and now I am going to have to go trapezeing, something I can honestly say was never in my Life Plan. I notice that one of the replies I got from my BEDA-friend Tobias was: “Now I understand why the Romans liked coliseums.” Yes, Tobias, CIRCUSES AND DEATH.

I know that the next big question is going to be: WHEN are you going to die/take this trapeze lesson? It’s important to schedule your own death correctly, so I’m looking over dates now. The most likely time at this second is late May . . . because my agent and several other people are coming to town and they all want to BE THERE to watch me DIE. Even my EDITOR wants to go. So I have to make sure I get the right moment so that everyone can watch the END OF ME.

I also know that people want to see proof. Naturally, this will be provided via video. Possibly several videos. And we’ll have plenty of time for me to build up and have a PROPER nervous breakdown, because it’s no good doing something like this without adequate time to think about your own stupidity, now IS THERE?

God only knows what I’ll do to myself next on Twitter.

But . . . let us go back to the LIFE point. We have a week left to blog every day. And I have just received the first box of Suite Scarlett paperbacks.**** So I am going to give one out to a RANDOM COMMENTER (one on blogger, and one on the Ning). Enter to win by leaving a comment, preferably with an ASK MJ question. Winners announced tomorrow!



* Like you are writing a query letter.

** Many things are examined in Extras, but Scott told me himself that one of the ideas he was riffing off of was a behavior he knew well—authors obsessively checking the Amazon rank. The point is, you should always listen when Scott Westerfeld is talking, because you just might learn something. He should have his own theme music. Like this, but with more hoverboards.

*** It must seem obnoxious to REFERENCE MYSELF. That’s not what I am attempting to do—it’s more that I am trying to avoid repeating myself. With all the blogging this month, I try to keep track of things I have already communicated to you. I want to make sure that I bring you only the FRESHEST information. Also, I am lazy, and linking to myself is easy.

**** At least, I think that’s what’s in the box. I haven’t opened it. Well, whatever it is, two people will win some of its contents.