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Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Parking Spectacular!

It's been a busy week, so this post is a bit of a catch-up.

For a start, I left the London Office on an extremely crowded flight back to New York, where I was promptly greeted with about two tons of mail. My trusted right-hand man Cartography Jones (not his real name, his real name is Will) took care of the New York desk in my absence.

Naturally, I had to celebrate Her Majesty's birthday. I was there, of course. And by "there" I mean "in England." But still. HRH Queen Elizabeth turned 80 years old, but still possesses that terrifying indestructibility that can't be natural. I don't know what they feed the Queen, but I suspect it just might be bowls full of batteries.

Easter was spent in the beautiful New Forest, where I was charged by a wild pony (slight exaggeration) and we had an amazing traditional English dinner.

After catching up in New York, I had to come down to the Philadelphia Desk, which is where I am now. I am a Philly girl, born and raised, which means I have an inborn understanding of water ice, cheese steaks (I'm still waiting for a decent vegetarian version), and the Mummers Parade. I am here because my dad had an operation last week (he's okay). So I spent several days last week sitting around in a hospital waiting area, playing Scrabble.

Now, let me explain something that happens EVERY SINGLE TIME I get anywhere near a Scrabble board. Someone pulls it out, and immediately someone says, "Oh, Maureen! You're a writer! You must love Scrabble! Oh, you're going to beat me! You must be so good at it."

I don't like Scrabble.

Don't get wrong--I like a board game now and again. Just not Scrabble. Anything but Scrabble. I think it is incredibly tedious, and I'm terrible at it to boot. It's like I forget how to speak English when I play Scrabble. I think this is boredom sickness. I limp along with words like "ax," "quiz," and "rug." And those take minutes of brow-knitting concentration.

But we played Scrabble because it was the only game in the waiting room with all the pieces. This was a better option than the extremely boring magazines they had. However, in this very house, tonight, I spotted a magazine which may win the Most Boring Magazine in existence Award:

Actual magazine

Why my father was reading "Parking Today" is completely beyond me. I'm almost afraid to ask. He's never expressed much interest in parking before. I didn't know you could have an interest in parking.

Because I simply had to, I looked up "Parking Today." Turns out, you can read it at home. Yes! It's Parking Today.com!

What kinds of things can you find there?

Well, everyone loves PIE. That's the Parking Industry Exhibition, with THREE SOLID DAYS of seminars on . . . parking.

Need to keep up to date on all of the major parking events? Well then, better check out this parking events calendar.

It even has a PARKING BLOG!

If that is your sort of thing, and you obviously want to be miserable, why not enjoy a snack as you read? Or maybe something more spectacular? Just a drink, maybe?

No? Okay. Up to you.

If you want to read a story about me (and I don't know, maybe you do), then go here.

For now, I'm off to bed, as I've been in the middle of a near-constant allergy attack since my arrival home. Today I got some wonderful medication that may actually allow me to sleep. When I next blog, there are many pressing issues that must be addressed! Like the completely awesome environmental movement in England and why David Blaine is spending a week in a bubble of water. So, let's hope this pill does the trick.

If not, there's always "Parking Today."